Monday, June 1, 2009

I miss...

the beach.
swimming everyday.
watching Gil and Z be silly.
my queen size bed.
cuddling [with a boy].
running through sprinklers.

I miss people. I miss him, especially. I can't wait until everything's back to how it was before... if it ever
can be. I miss the people that came into my life and slowly faded out. It was fantastic to have them, and I'm sad that they're gone now. But the memories will always stay with me. I miss seeing the waves from the balcony in Newport. I want to go back there. Maybe forever. I really wish I hadn't stopped swimming after high school. I feel like I was a much healthier person then. Ok, so my eating habits haven't changed since I was seven... but I exercise a lot less now. Oh, college, how you've ruined me. I LOVE Gil and Z. They are the most awesomely amazing little girls on the planet. They always make me smile and remember what's really important in life. And my bed... I really love it. Sometimes when I'm at home and I'm sleeping in my big, giant, comfy, four-poster I feel lost. It's a big change from the twin sized bed I sleep on at school. I don't miss the cuddling so much anymore. I'm pretty content with the way that part of my life is going. Well, for today at least. Running through sprinklers is by far the best most amazing thing to do in the summer. I plan on spending most of this Friday doing just that for Z's birthday! Teach 'em young! Ok, a little nostalgia here... I absolutely loved playing with Barbies when I was little. Or, you know, a pre-teen. I think my mom finally made me pack them all up when I turned 13. That was a sad day. One day, when I have little girls, you better believe that they will play with Barbies.

lil meg is my fav.

* as a disclaimer, I drafted this post about two months ago. Obviously, the things that I miss have changed. And are changing as I type this, because I'll be in Las Vegas tomorrow night. Which [don't take this personally, Mom] isn't home anymore. Home is where you go when you need someone to brighten your day, to make you feel good about yourself, or just to go when you want the world to stop for a while. And while my house in Las Vegas still does all those things for me, life is different now, and that part of my life doesn't understand this new part. That's why 509 is home for me now. Not the physical 509, that would be silly. My home is right here, at the kitchen table with Mikalyn and Kayla, mindy wrappers all around us, and Meg fast asleep on the couch. Home is in Bethy's special hugs and Brittney's many different voices. Home is dancing around the apartment for no reason in particular and bursting into song at any given moment. Home is the love that's spilling out of these windows, because four walls just can't hold it anymore. And even though we're all going different ways, we're all in the same place. Las Vegas, Rexburg, Upland, Logan, Sandy, Draper, Monteview. It doesn't matter where we go or how far apart we are.
"The ache for home lives in all of us, the safe place where we can go as we are and not be questioned." -Maya Angelou


mikalynkacey said...

Hahahahaha! MINDY WRAPPERS! I LOVE you Syd!

Lil' Meg said...

Yep...I cried. Miss my home...